I personally like a little slower flow through my sump.That way my skimmer has more time to do its work on the water coming thro.So I generally shoot for 3 to 4X turnover through my sump.
Flow in the display,Now thats a whole nother matter:D You know you got to much flow in the display when the sand is blowing like a sand storm.
In my 125,I have right at 59X flow rate ( surprised myself because I just figured that up:shock:). But thats something you have to play around with as your tank grows.As you add rock and corals,then the growth of the corals,the flow is going to change.